


Daddy: Mad, Bad and Dangerous to Know

by lycomingst



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: Meta, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-23
Updated: 2010-01-23
Packaged: 2017-10-06 15:09:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/54995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lycomingst/pseuds/lycomingst
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is an essay about problem-laden Father/Mentor relationships in the Whedonverse. Written in 2005.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Daddy: Mad, Bad and Dangerous to Know

**Daddy: Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to Know **

Writers in the Whedonverse know this eternal truth: Happy families don't make for good drama.

Parents in the Whedonverse are not thick on the ground. Good kids and bad kids alike in Sunnydale seem free of adult supervision. Mothers turn up, but they have little impact on their children's lives. Joyce, both before and after Buffy's outing as a Slayer, had little control over her. Willow's mother only meddled with her daughter under the impetus of a spell. Warren, Jonathan, and Andrew presumably had moms, yet these women never noticed their offsprings' meanders in the shadows of evil. When mothers are present, they can be malevolent or criminally neglectful, e.g. Amy's mother was an example for irresponsible witchery and poor Chris in "Some Assembly Required" resurrected his brother in the basement without mom noticing.

Nothing struck me as more symptomatic of the situation of the children of Sunnydale than the scene of their graduation. What should have been a formulaic ritual became a chaotic upheaval. A giant snake appeared, the students derobed to reveal weapons, and gangs of lumpy-faced adults rushed at the graduation gathering. Yet all the parents seated behind the graduates opted to save themselves, not one rushed to the defense of the children. What could be more telling of the state of familial feeling on the hellmouth?

That shirking of involvement could happen because the men of Sunnydale know that good fathering rarely pays off. Amy's dad got a vengeful witch, the anxious father in the Angel episode, "I've Got You Under My Skin", got a soulless psychopath. Maybe that's why most fathers have absented themselves. We never see the fathers of Cordelia, Willow, William, Oz, Gunn, or Doyle. Caring, protective fathers are few and far between. Instead, we get the other kind.

The list of disappointing father/mentor-child relationships is extensive:

The baseball coach in "Nightmares" nearly killed a disappointing player.  
The swimming coach in "Go Fish" drugged his team.  
Principal Snyder took every opportunity to make Buffy's life miserable and, moreover, was  
covertly in league with the wannabe demon Mayor.   
Tara's father has lied to her throughout her life in order to dominate her.  
Even demon daddies thwart their children. All Kathy, Buffy's demon roommate in college   
wanted was to go to school in the dimension of her choice, but papa said no.

Because Los Angeles is a darker world than Sunnydale, the male figures are correspondingly more evil:

The street minister in "Anne" leads his charges to slavery and early death.  
A father willingly offers his daughter in sacrifice for more personal power,in "Guise Will Be   
Guise".  
The daughter in "Untouched" suffered sexual abuse from her father.  
Roger Wyndam-Price's past treatment of his son Wesley is so horrendous that   
Wes readily believes that his father would conspire against and betray him.

It makes you think that the offspring who were simply abandoned got off easy. Time and again the father figure or the mentor in the lives of the children in Whedonverse turn on them. Instead of standing between the evil of the world and their children, they open the door to it.

No security exists between the generations, not even for the heroine. Her father drifted away. Giles, her Watcher, continually struggled with the balance of supporting his charge and helping her to find strength to stand on her own. And true to Whedonverse form, Giles betrayed Buffy's trust more than once. Among his treacheries:

The Cruciamentum, the Watchers' Council's test, was the first and most clearly dangerous deception Giles practiced on Buffy. Against his better judgment, Giles chose the Council over her.

He even joined with Angel, who as Angelus murdered Giles' girlfriend, to deceive Buffy in "Pangs", because they thought it would be in her best interest.

And years later, he conspired to kill Spike, behind Buffy's back, still thinking he should decide what is the right thing for her.

Yet in writing about these instances, I was struck by how vulnerable Giles' position is. Who's to know what the Slayer or any child will need in the future? Perhaps sternness now will help them later. How emotionally enmeshed could Giles afford to be with someone whose life is as precarious as Buffy's? And for every time Giles decides what best for Buffy without consulting her, Buffy has kept parts of her life hidden from Giles. So they have continuous misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Their reaction to that, I think, makes them one of the few successful father-child relationships in the Whedonverse. What sets them apart from the others is their reconciliation time and again, the forgiveness that Giles and Buffy repeatedly offer each other. Sometimes their motives are mutually incomprehensible, yet it's not a passive bond of love that unites them. By that I mean, they do not say to each other, _I need you in my life and will pretend you did not do what you just did_. Rather they can say to each other, _You are wrong, you hurt me, but we will go on from here_. It's always a choice that each makes, that the other person is worth loving, despite the troubles and sorrow it can bring.

I'd like to touch on the subject of fatherhood and betrayal by mentioning the only main character in Whedonverse who is a father: Angel.

When Angel is presented with the opportunity to be a father he wholeheartedly embraces it. He sees it as a gift he never expected. But, alas, unless the writers of Angel were willing to take in a radically different, more domestic, direction, the kid had to go. The realities of being responsible for a child would really end the adventures of a danger-seeking, free-wheeling vampire in no time. So Connor was magically re-invented as a teenager only weeks after being a baby.

Angel's loss of Connor may have dictated by necessity but it also added immeasurable depth to Angel's existence. Could Angel understand the suffering he caused others until he lost Connor? Every life he took when he was a vampire changed the lives of those left behind.

Poor Angel, always another lesson to learn.

The return of Connor as an angry teenager can be used as metaphor. Joss Whedon mentions in the commentary for the first Angel episode, "City of", that the recovering alcoholic is the pattern for Angel's journey. Can Angel's struggles with the teenaged Connor be viewed as attempts to repair the wreckage done to a relationship by a father absent because of his alcoholism?

Connor looks stony-eyed at Angel when he explains that he is not longer the monster he was, that everything is fine and good now. But the past is not so easily dismissed. For Connor has been betrayed, not only by the father that wasn't there, but by the one who was, Holtz.

First, Holtz separated Connor from his natural father, then he took him to a hell dimension where the child learned to that his life depended on being able to kill first. Not only were the survival lessons Holtz taught him harsh, but Connor was made to hate Angel. When Connor returns to Angel he is unable to overcome this schooled hatred, because rejecting it would be rejecting Holtz, the only security he has ever known. We know what Angelus did to Holtz, so his eternal hatred is understandable, but Holtz's final betrayal of Connor is unforgivable. By making it look like his death was at the hands of Angel, Holtz meant to poison forever the relationship of father and son. Despite whatever love he felt for Connor, Holtz's need for revenge on Angel was much, much stronger, and Connor became no more than a tool to inflict it.

But the question of this essay is, what are we to make of this? Why all the bad, murderous, evil, corrupt, weak, betraying fathers and father-figures in Buffy, the Vampire Slayer and Angel, the Series?

First of all, successful storytelling involves conflict. And long term storytelling, like a successful TV series, needs a variety of villains. So, not only do we have monsters that represent the world at large, we have more intimate enemies. To quote Joss:

"First of all, if you don't feel afraid, horror show not good. We learned early on, the scariest thing on that show was people behaving badly, or in peril, morally speaking, or just people getting weird on you—which, by the way, is the scariest thing in life."   
The Onion AV Club Volume 37 Issue 31

This is truly a universal experience; everyone can remember as a child being subjected to an adult's incomprehensible anger and how powerless it makes one feel. So bringing the "bad father" into his shows allows Joss to tap into this feeling of being impotent and helpless, and thus very scared, that is buried in all of us.

Another theme Joss writes about in his work (as he mentions in his commentary of the Firefly episode, "Objects in Space"), is the essential aloneness of all humans. Sometimes there are monsters we must battle, and when we look for help, there is none. This cavalcade of inadequate or evil parents is a metaphor underlining Joss' outlook. Sometimes the people whom we trust the most let us down. We have to accept that and make our own way.

Joss never made it clearer than in "Becoming":

 

Angelus: " Now that's everything, huh? No weapons... No friends... No hope. Take all that away... and what's left?"

Buffy: "Me."

You're on your own, folks.


End file.
